{"id":3171,"date":"2024-09-10T15:09:27","date_gmt":"2024-09-10T15:09:27","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/maxibancuri.ro\/?p=3171"},"modified":"2024-09-10T15:09:30","modified_gmt":"2024-09-10T15:09:30","slug":"doi-barbati-stau-la-coada-la-poarta-raiului","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/maxibancuri.ro\/?p=3171","title":{"rendered":"Doi b\u0103rba\u021bi stau la coad\u0103 la Poarta Raiului."},"content":{"rendered":"\n

Doi b\u0103rba\u021bi stau la coad\u0103 la Poarta Raiului.<\/strong><\/em>
\u2013 Tu cum ai murit?<\/strong><\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u2013 Am murit \u00eenghe\u021bat. Dar tu?<\/strong><\/em>
\u2013 Am facut infarct.<\/strong><\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u2013 Cum s-a \u00eentamplat?<\/strong><\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u2013 Ei bine, suspectam de ceva vreme c\u0103 nevasta m\u0103 \u00een\u0219al\u0103. \u00centr-o zi, am plecat mai devreme de la munc\u0103, am ajuns inopinat acas\u0103 \u0219i am urcat la etaj.<\/strong><\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u00cen dormitor, era navast\u0103-mea, dar singur\u0103. Apoi, am cobor\u00e2t sc\u0103rile \u0219i am c\u0103utat \u00een toate locurile posibile, unde s-ar fi putut ascunde amantul.<\/strong><\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

Nu l-am g\u0103sit. Dar efortul a fost prea mult pentru mine \u0219i am f\u0103cut infarct.<\/strong><\/em>
\u2013 Asta e chiar ironic!<\/strong><\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u2013 De ce?<\/strong><\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u2013 Pentru c\u0103 am fi tr\u0103it am\u00e2ndoi dac\u0103 te-ai fi uitat din prima \u00een frigider!\u201d<\/strong><\/em>,<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u2013\u2013\u2013\u2013\u2013\u2013\u2013\u2013\u2013\u2013\u2013\u2013\u2013\u2013-<\/p>\n\n\n\n

BANC | \u2013 Cum e s\u0103 fii \u00eensurat, Bul\u0103?<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u2013 P\u0103i, cum s\u0103 fie? N-am voie s\u0103 beau, n-am voie s\u0103 fumez, n-am voie s\u0103 merg cu amicii la o bere, n-am voie s\u0103 m\u0103 uit dup\u0103 vreo femeie pe strad\u0103\u2026<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u2013 \u00censeamn\u0103 c\u0103 regre\u021bi pasul pe care l-ai f\u0103cut?<\/p>\n\n\n\n

-Nici asta nu am voie<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u2013 Tzrrrrrrrrrrrrr!, Tzrrrrrrrrrrrr! ( se aude telefonul sunand)
Fetita ridica receptorul:
\u2013 Alooo?
\u2013 Buna, scumpo mea sunt eu, tati. Mama e cumva prin apropierea telefonului?<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u2013 Nu, tati, mami e la etaj, in dormitor, cu unchiul Paul.
Dupa o scurta pauza, tati zice:<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u2013 Dar, scumpa mea, care unchi Paul ca tu nu ai niciun unchi Paul!
\u2013 Oh, ba da,cum sa nu am, si el e la etaj, in camera cu mami, chiar in acest moment.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

O alta scurta pauza.
\u2013 Uf, bine atunci draga mea, vreau ca tu sa faci ceva pentru tati: lasa receptorul pe masa, alerga la etaj si bate la usa dormitorului si striga la mami: \u201eMami, mami, masina lui tati tocmai a intrat \u00een parcare!\u201d
\u2013 Bine, tati, doar un minut.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Cateva minute mai tirziu, fetita vine inapoi la telefon.
\u2013 Am facut ce mi-ai spus, tati.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u2013 Si ce sa int\u00e2mplat, scumpa mea?<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u2013 Ei bine, mami s-a speriat tare rau, a sarit din pat fara nicio haina pe ea, a inceput sa alerge in stanga si in dreapta tipand, apoi s-a impiedicat de covor, s-a lovit\u2026<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u2013 O, Doamne, nu pot sa cred! Si ce imi poti spune despre unchiul tau Paul?<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u2013 Si el a sarit din pat, fara haine pe el si el s-a speriat rau si a sarit pe fereastra din spate direct in piscina. Dar cred ca nu stia ca saptamana trecuta ati scos apa, ca sa o curatati. S-a lovit de fundul piscinei .<\/p>\n\n\n\n

O lunga pauza.
Urmata de o pauza si mai lunga.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

O foarte lunga pauza, apoi intr-un final tati spune:
\u2013 Piscina zici? \u00c3\u00e3\u00e3\u00e3\u00e3\u2026. Aveti cumva numarul 486-5731?
\u2013 Nu, cred ca ati gresit numarul\u2026..<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Doi b\u0103rba\u021bi stau la coad\u0103 la Poarta Raiului.\u2013 Tu cum ai murit? \u2013 Am murit \u00eenghe\u021bat. Dar tu?\u2013 Am facut infarct. \u2013 Cum s-a \u00eentamplat? \u2013 Ei bine, suspectam de ceva vreme c\u0103 nevasta m\u0103 \u00een\u0219al\u0103. \u00centr-o zi, am plecat mai devreme de la munc\u0103, am ajuns inopinat acas\u0103 \u0219i am urcat la etaj. \u00cen … Read more<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":3,"featured_media":3172,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-3171","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-uncategorized"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/maxibancuri.ro\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3171","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/maxibancuri.ro\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/maxibancuri.ro\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/maxibancuri.ro\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/3"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/maxibancuri.ro\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=3171"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/maxibancuri.ro\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3171\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":3173,"href":"https:\/\/maxibancuri.ro\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3171\/revisions\/3173"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/maxibancuri.ro\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/media\/3172"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/maxibancuri.ro\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=3171"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/maxibancuri.ro\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=3171"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/maxibancuri.ro\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=3171"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}