{"id":278,"date":"2024-04-25T07:53:30","date_gmt":"2024-04-25T07:53:30","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/tustiaica.ro\/?p=278"},"modified":"2024-10-03T06:10:51","modified_gmt":"2024-10-03T06:10:51","slug":"un-tip-se-plimba-prin-tel-aviv-cand-vede-in-vitrina-unui-magazin-un-expus-un-ceas","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/maxibancuri.ro\/?p=278","title":{"rendered":"Un tip se plimba prin Tel Aviv cand vede in vitrina unui magazin un expus un ceas"},"content":{"rendered":"\n<p><br><\/p>\n\n\n\n<figure class=\"wp-block-gallery has-nested-images columns-default is-cropped wp-block-gallery-1 is-layout-flex wp-block-gallery-is-layout-flex\">\n<figure class=\"wp-block-image size-large\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" width=\"680\" height=\"923\" data-id=\"3566\" src=\"https:\/\/maxibancuri.ro\/wp-content\/uploads\/2024\/04\/IMG_0088.jpeg\" alt=\"\" class=\"wp-image-3566\" srcset=\"https:\/\/maxibancuri.ro\/wp-content\/uploads\/2024\/04\/IMG_0088.jpeg 680w, https:\/\/maxibancuri.ro\/wp-content\/uploads\/2024\/04\/IMG_0088-221x300.jpeg 221w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 680px) 100vw, 680px\" \/><\/figure>\n<\/figure>\n\n\n\n<p>Un tip se plimba prin Tel Aviv cand vede in vitrina unui magazin un expus un ceas. Intra in magazin si spune:<br>\u2013 Buna ziua, as vrea sa cumpar ceasul acela!<br>\u2013 Stiti.. nu e de vanzare.. dar daca vreti, va putem face o circumcizie!<br>\u2013 Nu, multumesc\u2026 as vrea sa cumpar ceasul acela din vitrina.. e un ceas foarte frumos..<br>\u2013 V-am spus ca nu e de vanzare.. dar daca veniti cu un prieten, va facem 2 circumcizii la pret de una!<br>Tipul se enerveaza si izbucneste:<br>\u2013 Dar mai lasati-ma in pace cu circumciziile! Eu vreau ceasul!!<br>Vanzatorul ofteaza si spune:<br>\u2013 Stiti.. noi aici nu vindem ceasuri.. Aici facem circumcizii.<br>Tipul intreaba:<br>\u2013 Pai atunci, de ce ati pus ceasul in vitrina?<br>\u2013 Pai\u2026 ce era sa punem?<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>          CITE\u0218TE \u0218I URMATORUL BANC \ud83d\udc47<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><br>Un politist gaseste, la colt de strada, un pusti care vindea ceva, in gramajoare mici. Acesta il intreaba pe baiat, cu un aer sever:<br>\u2013 Ma, ce faci tu aici?<br>\u2013 Vand samburi de mar, domnule.<br>\u2013 si la ce sunt buni astia?<br>\u2013 Dau minte, domnule.<br>Bine, da-mi si mie de doi lei\u2026Politistul ia samburii si incepe sa se indeparteze, mestecandu-i. La un moment dat, se opreste si se intoarce la baiat, luandu-l la rost:\u2013 Ma smechere, cu doi lei cumparam un kil de mere si aveam mai multi samburi!\u2013 Vezi, nene, nici nu ai mancat bine samburii, ca ti-a si venit mintea la cap!<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>         CITE\u0218TE \u0218I URMATORUL BANC \ud83d\udc47<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><br>O italianc\u0103 dintr-o familie catolic\u0103 conservatoare s-a c\u0103s\u0103torit virgin\u0103.<br>\u00cenainte de noaptea nun\u021bii, vorbe\u0219te cu menajera ei rom\u00e2nc\u0103:<br>&#8211; Mi-e team\u0103 pentru c\u0103 nu \u0219tiu aproape nimic despre o rela\u021bia intim\u0103 dintre un b\u0103rbat \u0219i o femeie! M-ai ajuta cu un sfat?<br>Menajera \u00eei r\u0103spunse:<br>&#8211; S\u0103 nu-\u021bi fie fric\u0103 draga mea! Voi fi \u00een buc\u0103t\u0103rie \u0219i voi g\u0103ti spaghete. Dac\u0103 te deranjeaz\u0103 ceva, ie\u0219i \u0219i \u00eentreab\u0103-m\u0103 !<br>Merg cei doi \u00een dormitor..<br>La un moment dat, t\u00e2n\u0103ra mireas\u0103 a ie\u0219it \u00eengrijorat\u0103:<br>&#8211; Wow, are o multime de p\u0103r pe piept! Este normal?<br>Menajera a r\u0103spuns :<br>&#8211; Draga mea, to\u021bi b\u0103rba\u021bii adev\u0103ra\u021bi au p\u0103r pe piept! F\u0103r\u0103 fric\u0103.. e\u0219ti pe drumul cel bun.<br>Dup\u0103 un timp, fata a ap\u0103rut din nou:<br>&#8211; Wow, are picioarele p\u0103roase!<br>&#8211; Draga mea, to\u021bi b\u0103rba\u021bii adev\u0103ra\u021bi au picioare p\u0103roase! F\u0103r\u0103 fric\u0103.. continu\u0103!<br>Cinci minute mai t\u00e2rziu, mireasa apare destul de alarmat\u0103 :<br>&#8211; Wow, are o p**\u0103 foarte mare!<br>Menajera \u00eei spune:<br>&#8211; Offf, drag\u0103! R\u0103m\u00e2i aici \u0219i ocup\u0103-te de spaghete! Asta deja e treaba menajerei!<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Un tip se plimba prin Tel Aviv cand vede in vitrina unui magazin un expus un ceas. Intra in magazin si spune:\u2013 Buna ziua, as vrea sa cumpar ceasul acela!\u2013 Stiti.. nu e de vanzare.. dar daca vreti, va putem face o circumcizie!\u2013 Nu, multumesc\u2026 as vrea sa cumpar ceasul acela din vitrina.. e un &#8230; <a title=\"Un tip se plimba prin Tel Aviv cand vede in vitrina unui magazin un expus un ceas\" class=\"read-more\" href=\"https:\/\/maxibancuri.ro\/?p=278\" aria-label=\"Read more about Un tip se plimba prin Tel Aviv cand vede in vitrina unui magazin un expus un ceas\">Read more<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":3,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-278","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-uncategorized"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/maxibancuri.ro\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/278","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/maxibancuri.ro\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/maxibancuri.ro\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/maxibancuri.ro\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/3"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/maxibancuri.ro\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=278"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/maxibancuri.ro\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/278\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":3568,"href":"https:\/\/maxibancuri.ro\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/278\/revisions\/3568"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/maxibancuri.ro\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=278"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/maxibancuri.ro\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=278"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/maxibancuri.ro\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=278"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}